What a wife wants

Being the way I am have allowed me to experience life in such a way that has been both memorable and writable, which is why I like this quote from Benjamin Franklin "Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing". It has taken many years of practice with writing to get to where I am at this moment, and I do not feel I am anywhere near where I want to be. I wish I could go back to college and strengthen my skills as a writer.

I have begun collecting those things that I am sure every wife wants but may not be willing or able to tell their husbands. Periodically I will post a couple of them at a time. My goal is to try to implement those particular things in my relationship with my wife in the days following their posting. Over time I hope to see myself become a better husband. It is never too late to teach an old dog new tricks. I will be happy to hear from women who have ideas on how to expand this list. Now for your consideration:

1. Centrality. When you are out she wants to be the centre of your attention, even when the focus is on something else (a cricket match, a movie, a game of football). She wants to know that when she needs it she can get your attention immediately and compared to any other woman who might be in the same universe with you she is number one by a wide margin.

2. Complimentary. She wants to be complimented, even if it is related to peripheral things like her clothes, or her shoes, but any other choice she might make (good suggestion on this restaurant dear, I am glad you suggested we…) works just as well. It tells her on a continuing basis that you value her, that you still love her, that you notice what she says and does.

3. Requested. She wants to be asked, not told. “Would you like to go the movies”, rather than “let’s go to the movies.” It means she is important enough to be asked, to be considered. This is especially important after you have kids so that she feels she is being treated like an adult as well as your wife and not lumped in with the children. (God, help me remember when I become a dad).

So my goal for the immediate future is to work on treating my wife as central, with ongoing compliments, and always to remember to ask and not tell. May by the grace of God you join me in this quest. What makes my bones shiver is that am just the exact opposite.

The mind that is as soft and pliable as a sponge would have the capacity for maximum absorption. Just as water can be easily absorbed by the sponge and squeezed out, a soft mind easily absorbs information and allows the creation of knowledge and action. However, a soft or open mind can be hardened and a hard or closed mind can be softened. What do you say? Well, let me see how good I am at adapting, improvising and executing. :)