Nothing hurts more than when a person whom you’ve trusted–and even helped and done favors for, turns out to be a complete Judas. So here I am, broken and a little bit bloody, trying my best to figure out how to move forward. I’ve always had a motto: Everyone is a friend until proven otherwise. The problem with that is sometimes "friends” ingratiate themselves for a period of time until an attachment is formed, and it hurts more when you discover they weren’t friends, they were…well, "otherwise.”
Backstabbing friends are a part of life, and the act itself happens to nearly everyone at some point in life. The betrayal of a trusted friend or colleague inflicts pain and hurt.
Behaving like your best friend with smiles, a helpful attitude, and promises of loyalty and trustworthiness, the backstabber waits for the right moment and then turns on you with a vengeance. The backstabber’s ways are manipulative as they uses low-ball tactics that make you appear to be a liar, a thief or someone not to be trusted.
People who backstab tend to be insecure. Dr. Les Parrot, author of High Maintenance Relationships, lists these adjectives to describe a backstabber: "vindictive, revengeful, deceitful, conniving, resentful, and angry.” He also adds passive-aggressive behavior as another trait of the backstabbing friend or coworker.
Reasons why people backstab others range from cowardice to a need for power. The sole purpose of backstabbing is gaining the upper hand and garnering power. Backstabbing is not limited to one individual or another. One of the most famous examples of backstabbing comes from ancient Rome where Julius Caesar was stabbed 23 times by members of the Senate and his friend, Marcus Junius Brutus. As the blows fell from Brutus’ dagger, Caesar’s last words, "You too my child?” underscore the disbelief he had that a friend could backstab him.
"Sometimes friends who feel unsuccessful will drift away or cut you off when you have the success they’re longing for. Most jealousy arises when someone feels insecure or threatened — that someone will get the attention they wants. The most important thing you can do is to remember that when you handle jealousy properly, it does not have to be a disaster.”
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